ALL THE KINGS MEN

“We must be silent before we can listen, we must listen before we can learn.  We must learn before we can prepare.  We must prepare before we can serve. We must serve before we can lead.” – William Arthur Ward

The first meeting of a project is always a fascinating experience, and this is exemplified in cross cultural situations.  It is a chance for us, as project leaders, to start observing the political and hierarchical make-up of our team. In a very short period of time we need to suss out who is the leader by title but also who is the actual leader in the room.  We are also looking for underlying political connections – e.g. who’s aligned with whom and who does not get along as this needs to be understood with regard to project risks as well as communication strategies across a project.

And so, our first meeting for the Anganwadi Project with the Rural Development Trust did not disappoint in the slightest – it was truly fascinating!  I feel a blow by blow recap is necessary for you to imagine yourself sitting in the room…

Our first meeting was scheduled for 10am, in alignment with our western culture, we prepared some documents to present including a proposed project timeline and some initial deliverables. We were prepared for our cultural requirements and were mentally ready to adapt to any differences in project methodology as a result of working in India. Quite simply we were over-prepared, but in both our thinking better to be in this situation rather than the opposite.

And so 1015am rolled around and the Chai man came in with his well-received thermos delivering tiny thimbles of blissful Chai. A huge smile spread across my face and I express my gratitude with a warm, “Namaste.” My colleague and I keep emailing and remain at attention by discretely watching the room.  One of our new Indian counterpart gestures at freshly rolled cigarette in his hand and adjacent thimball of Chai and says to that we’ll start when he is back in his office – he is the head of our section of RDT and a lead structural engineer.  We nod respectfully awaiting direction on where the meeting will be held.  While this gentleman is out having a fag, we receive an email from one of the higher ups in the organization advising the meeting will be held in his office in 5 minutes.  So, we come even more to attention and gather our things.  Watching the others in the room so that we go with them, and no sooner, aiming to indirectly send a message that we are with them and not separate.

The gentleman returns from his cigarette and thimble of chai consumption and we advise an email has been sent discussing location of the meeting to be in another person's office.  He nods and we all gather our things and slowly head over to this new office, that of a more senior individual in the organisation.  We wait outside until called in, reminding me of elementary school days when you might be in trouble but weren’t sure yet.

Once invited, we all come in, but it is obvious there are not enough chairs for everyone and we as ‘madams’ are asked to sit first, but this ensures one of the men on our team has to go and find himself a chair. Then as we all sit prepared to begin and with our eyes directed at the person who has called the meeting in his office, he finishes signing a few documents held out by is personal assistant and we sit in silence.  Upon completion of signing the documents, this gentlemen, who is extremely high up in the organisation, directs his attention to me and my colleague – asking how our stay is going and how the project is going with absolutely no recognition of the three other men in the room.  We politely engage and advise that we are very happy with how everything is going and use the conversation to include the others in by saying they have welcomed us and been very helpful.  This direction of conversation felt as a rather over way of showing to our new colleagues that we were to be respected and supported.

The he rises and pulls out his own cigarette from a beautiful gold tin and advises he will be back shortly. This was a very interesting power play I felt – much like when a person gets up to go to the bathroom during a board game just before their turn; it was subtle and it assured we all knew who was running this meeting and in general who was overseeing the project.  Once out of the room two of the three gentlemen engaged with their cell phones by making phone calls that would require everyone to wait even after our meeting lead returned from his cigarette.  Upon his return he also ‘decided’ to accept a phone call once back at his desk, I believe to ensure he had the last play and again assert himself.

Throughout the remainder of the meeting the conversation was around introductions, but the message was extremely clear – this needs to be positively received, in the modus operandi of The Anganwadi Project needs to be adhered to with regard to using recycled materials and aiming to be sustainable, and it also needs to happen in the timeframe these volunteers require.  There was a bit of shock from our three engineering counterparts with regards to the timeline and the required use of recycled or more sustainable materials, but the head of the meeting kept reinforcing this ethos and the importance of the success of the project.  Quite basically there was an extremely subtle undertone of, “this is happening, and you will be supportive gents, mark my words.”

At the end of the meeting it was almost noon, my colleague and I had planned to add our own subtle gesture to the mix by asking for a group photo.  The aim of which was to symbolise our intent to work together, as one, through this simple gesture.   Below is the photo, I will let you imagine who played which role above, but it was truly a fascinating experience.  I would bet it was similar to many meetings between presidents and diplomats where you must pay attention to every flinch of a finger, every directed glance, etc.